Eva Karen was born at eight minutes to eight, on the 2nd Febuary 1999, weighing seven pounds.

I had had a very tiring pregnancy, having lost as usual two stone due to vomiting. (I am the only woman I know who is significantly lighter right through pregnancy.) When the nesting urge came on me, it arrived unaccompanied by the usual burst of energy, so on Sunday night I was dragging myself around, glumly tidying. I had a feeling things were imminent and that I should get things finished up, even though I was not due officially till the following Friday.

On Monday morning, I had five lovely strong contractions twenty minutes apart, and felt a deep sense of satisfaction. I also knew for the first time for certain what sex the baby would be, that this was Eva on her way. It had annoyed me during the pregnancy that I had no clear sense of whether it was a boy or girl, as during my previous three pregnancies ( one of which ended in miscarriage), I was absolutely certain of the sex.

Just after the fifth contraction my son Ben, then five, and Robyn, aged two, bounced into the bed with me, and everything stopped completely. I felt frustrated but philosophical. At least now I could go into school to sort out some details with the person taking over my post. We sat together on lab stools, and I felt very uncomfortable, with a great feeling of pressure.

I had a book review to finish for the Sunday Business Post, which took me till 2.30 in the morning. I still felt very uncomfortable, but nothing dramatic. I tried to sleep , but couldn't.

Around ten to four, things started happening with a vengeance. Lying in the dark beside my sleeping husband, Brendan, contractions built up with unnerving force. In my last labour, they had begun in a very manageable way over a period of hours. These had only begun, and yet I could not get on top of them at all by breathing, or by using my outward breath to repeat phrases of a childhood prayer, which got me through hours of the last labour. They were also very close together, perhaps only minutes apart.

Panicking slightly, I woke Brendan and we went downstairs. In the previous labour I had wanted to lie down and be alone, but I really needed him there this time. Perching on the edge of the sofa, leaning forward with my elbows on my knees gave some relief, but very little. Brendan rang Kate Spillane, who was her usual cool and reassuring self. I was quite frightened , which frightened me more, as the last time I had been in almost an altered state of consciousness by the time things got to this level.

Kate arrived around 5.10 and set about calming me down. I did not want to go back upstairs so Bren blew up an airbed, and settled me on it. I felt so reassured once Kate arrived, I immediately started coping better with the contractions, which were not reduced any in strength. I pretended to go to sleep so Bren would go back to bed, as I felt we would need one person with energy in the next few days. Very reluctantly he acceded.

Now Kate will never forgive me for recording this, but she sat on the sofa in the darkened room, fell asleep and snored. It may be unorthodox, but it was perfect for me. All I had to do was stretch my leg out to waken her, and I remember thinking,"Well, Kate's not worried, so things are OK."

The next hour and a half flew by. The contractions came in groups of three, a tiny gap, and then three more. I felt on the verge of losing it all the time, and resorted in the end to talking to myself, saying incoherent things in my own mind. Moving around was out of the question. I hung on till I could not cope any more, and woke Kate and asked her to talk to me, which she did. I then felt a mad urge to pee, but had no idea how I would get to the loo. I moaned to Kate that I was afraid of wetting myself, and she replied comfortingly, "What harm if you do?'

After a very brief respite I managed to get upright, and amidst contractions staggered out to the loo, luckily only feet away. When we came back, Kate examined me and declared I was fully dilated. My answer was to moan "Are you sure?" This daft comment was inspired by the fact that it felt too painful to push.

I learnt later that Eva's lovely little hand was by her head, and the cord was around the neck. That explained the mixed messages about pushing. By now I was on my knees, leaning forward onto an armchair, while Kate tried to wake Bren, without waking the children. Eventually, an extra large groan from me woke him. Kate asked me if I wanted to lean on him, and I barked "no!" .

I talked incessantly out loud to the baby, feeling that she and I were in this together, exhilarated by every move down the birth canal, plunged into the depths of despair every time I felt her move back. Eventually her head emerged. Kate tells me that she told me to take it easy as she untangled the cord, but I don't remember any of this. Kate accomplished it in a trice. I really felt the shoulders coming out, and it may have been at this point that I tore. The baby emerged in a tremendous gush, and her hot little body was quickly placed on my back. I remember registering that her body was longer than Robyn's had been. (Ben was a C- section birth, so I cannot compare very much.)

The baby was passed under my leg in a complicated manoeuvre. I felt so relieved and happy. Right from those first five contractions on Monday morning I felt Eva had a lovely spirit, and nothing since has made me feel any different.

I hate passing the placenta and being stitched because I feel I have done as much as any reasonable woman could be asked to do, but Kate did all the needful with her usual grace and kindness.  After it, when I was again sitting up, in the armchair.

Bren woke the children who greeted Eva with such unfeigned joy that I will remember the moment forever. Robyn grabbed a handful of her brother's blasters and guns and gave them to her in a spontaneous gesture of welcome. Ben , not to be outdone, handed her one of Robyn's dolls. It was a wonderful moment, and put the fear , pain and effort of the previous hours completely into perspective. In our case, home birth was wonderful for sibling bonding.

This may not sound like an exactly idyllic birth, nor would I skim over the difficulties. But I was so glad to be in my own home, with the protective and supportive presence of my beloved Bren, and the kindness of Kate. Everything would have been so much worse for me in the alien atmosphere of a hospital.